The Birth of My Blog

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It has been 7 months since I started my blog. It is an amazing journey where I experienced a lot of new things from God. I didn’t know that I can write until He has asked me to write this blog. He is also the one who gives me ideas and topics what to write and I am thankful that I am in this journey with Him.

I would like to share the story behind my blog so my readers will know me better and of course I hope through this, you all will love our God even more.

It started from early January 2020. I normally enter every New Year with full of hopes and expectations. However I entered 2020 with full of sorrow. At that time we as family were in agony waiting for the time when my late brother would be going. At the end of December 2019, in the hospital, while my late brother was in palliative care, doctor has warned us that he only had few more days to live. While I was still believing for a miracle to happen, God had different plan for him. He passed away on 04 January 2020.

For months after his pass, I have pitied myself, I have pitied my families that had to go through this. Feeling sorry and angry why we have to experience this. Not a single day passed without thinking of him and his family.

Another problem, I have been feeling a lot of discomforts in my body. In the past few years suddenly I have got many conditions that make me feel stress and sad. I started to have asthma which I didn’t used to have before, then allergy in my nose where it started to cause sinus when it attacks. Then I started to have problem in my stomach. I also suddenly have eye problem where my eye keeps getting inflamed and red and I didn’t know the cause of it. This eye problem has gotten me into real stress because when it is get inflamed I will feel the pain and I couldn’t see for weeks even months. To make it worse it keeps coming and I didn’t know how to stop it. And lastly I had a problem with my blood keep getting low due to heavy bleeding because of fibroid in my uterus.

With these series of physical problems it made me even more pity on myself. I was only in my early 40s but why I had to endure all of these. Though they are not big problems but they are big enough for me to move on with my life.

Losing my brother certainly forced me to have a new chapter of my life but I felt lost and didn’t know what to do with these physical problems. It limits my movement.

But I thank for His grace for me. His grace was the one who helped me cling unto Him no matter what. I could have gone away from Him, feeling disappointed but His grace drew me near to Him even more. I asked Him what I can do for Him. In my eyes, I couldn’t do much. But I asked Him anyway if there is something He still think I am capable of doing. After asking many times, suddenly he answered me in mid-2020. I heard Him saying, be an encourager for my people.

I didn’t quite understand at first but soon he revealed more to me. I then thought why should I encourage people while I am the one who need to be encouraged? I was sad, hurt and in pain. I didn’t feel like to encourage people when I am not in my good mood. But this is our God. His mind is different with ours. His plan is greater than we can imagine. He knows that I can recover quicker by doing this. He wanted to help me to shake my dirt off and move on to my new chapter of life.

I then took the offer. I didn’t know what to do at first, but I consulted with my pastor and we came up with writing a blog. I didn’t know that I can write but I tried anyway. I just didn’t want to say “I can’t” before I really try because I know when God is with me, I can do all things.

As time goes by, He slowly helps me with my condition. He helped me with the surgery so I don’t have to experience blood lost anymore. And He also gave me some ways out and wisdom to ease down the discomfort for my stomach, my nose allergy, and my eye.

From this I learned that God knows what I need. He knows that I need to be healed spiritually after my brother’s pass and He knows that I want to be healed from my physical condition. But He wants me not to focus on those but focus on Him. As I focus on doing His will, He will take care of what I need. And I believe this will go the same with you as well if you are courageous enough to accept His invitation.

I hope my sharing brings blessing to you and you can see God’s heart in your life.

 

 

Comments

  1. Pit Djan26 March 2021 at 03:36

    Your heart surrender and your obedience are precious testimonies to be shared and very encouraging for me Merry. Thank youu..🙏💖🙏

    ReplyDelete

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